HELPING OTHERS
Karen Bergman
September 11, 2001, was a day of shock, grief and uncertainty to all of us. The events of that day made many stop and re-evaluate priorities, changing focus to the people and the relationships that we hold most dear. Last fall another kind of catastrophe sent shock waves through our financial lives. Like the original 9/11, some people were more affected than others by the sudden loss of value of stocks, homes, and retirement funds, but we all experienced some jolt to our financial safety systems.
Most of us are coping with these new financial realities. We still have a job. While the loss of value of our residences is unnerving, we still have a home and hope that the values will rebound – eventually. We separate the needs from the desires in our daily living, carefully funding the former and deferring or forgetting the latter. We make wiser choices – like repairing rather than replacing, recycling instead of trashing, coffee instead of a latte, and homemade instead of fast food.
But there are people in our town who are hurting and afraid for their futures. What do you say to the neighbor whose home is in foreclosure? How do you encourage the niece who was hired, only to be the first fired at her jobsite? Are there any words of comfort or encouragement to someone in dire financial straits?
A retired Redlands schoolteacher gave me an answer worth considering. “Words can ring hollow or even sound insincere when not accompanied by action,” she told me. In the past, she knew a child who was living in a tent but still attending school. Some of the teachers were aware of the situation and they individually responded by inviting the child and her family to their own homes for dinner.
She told of a more recent story of a young mother who wanted to teach her own children about compassion. She took her children to Joseph’s Storehouse (a support service agency in Redlands for those in need) and discovered that some churches staff cold weather shelters in Redlands. The young family’s response to the situation was to bring hot soup to those spending the night in one of those shelters.
The question, then, isn’t “What do we say?” but “What do we do?” The answers will be as varied as the talents, opportunities and resources of you who are reading
this magazine. Some help keep the shelters open and
others bring hot soup. Some invite a family to dinner
and others assemble an extra bag of groceries on their
next trip to the store.
So what are you going to do when you hear the news
about a friend or a relative? No doubt each of us will have
a chance to express the depth of our concern. Will you
offer a cup of coffee and listen with
compassion to the anxious fears of
someone newly unemployed or
facing foreclosure? Would you
help someone pack to move to
a less expensive place? Would
you share your computer to
help someone prepare and
send a resume? Are you willing to give away some clothes that would be perfect for someone at a job interview? Will you offer a room in your home to a relative needing a temporary place to stay?
It is a mistake to measure help in dollars – though those are always needed by the service agencies in our area. Many meaningful acts cost little or nothing from our wallets. Make yourself a promise today that you will respond with more than words. Focus on doing the kind deed and expressing the kind word to smooth the way. It is individuals who made this a wonderful town in which to live, and I believe that the people of Redlands will be ready with supportive deeds to accompany our encouraging words as we help each other through these rocky times.
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